DAVID FLINT must have thought all his Christmases had come at once when the dreaded ALP lost the last federal election and his old mate Tony Abbott was handed the keys to The Lodge.
I can hear the old dear hissing:
Now we'll see some real royal action. Our man is at the helm!
Some readers may not be aware that one of the few jobs Abbott had before entering politics was secretary of Australians for Constitutional Monarchy — that's if it could be called a “job”. It was really an apprenticeship under the tutelage of D. Flint himself, who sneakily got control of ACM and, as we know now, has claimed it as his personal fiefdom.
It was Flint who came up with the bizarre plan to offer Membership with voting rights to a handful of his mates, while the others were sold sponsorship with no rights whatsoever.
So much for democracy and so much for gaining total control.
Well, it seems Abbott is not quite the rabid monarchist Flint had thought.
First, dear old darling Dave wanted the Menzies plan reintroduced.
In Pig Iron Bob's day, when the office of Governor-General became vacant, Menzies would send two names to London and the Queen would make the final decision.
That soon fell by the wayside when subsequent Prime Ministers learned that the Queen had to do what "her" Prime Ministers wanted. She does what she is told, as well she should — she is nothing more and nothing less than a highly paid public servant with virtually no powers of her own.
(This drawing and the one below both by John Graham / johngraham.alphalink.com.au)
So, therefore, asking the Queen to select the Australian G-G is the same as asking the British Government to make the decision.
See the problem there?
Flint must be furious to learn that Abbott wants our own politicians’ general as G-G and, of course, ERII has "agreed" — like she had any choice in the matter.
(Anyway, I must remind dear readers ‒ with no false modesty whatsoever ‒ that I predicted the name of Her Excellency's successor several weeks ago.)
Then Flint came up with another dark ages request — the restoration of Imperial titles in the Order of Australia. The last Prime Minister to do this ‒ and he did it to his undying shame ‒ was Malcolm Fraser.
David even demanded that future G-G's be knighted automatically knighted on assuming the office.
Abbott, presumably, returned his Young Liberal tactics by punching a hole in the wall when he heard of Flint's demand and, to put it mildly, went ape.
Within hours, Abbott made it clear titles were an anachronism and totally out of place in egalitarian Australia and would certainly not be restored under his watch.
He knew his Government would become the laughing stock David Flint is if it restored the fripperies, fancies and favours of British Empire in egalitarian Australia in the 21st Century.
So where does this leave Flint, we may well ask.
I would say up that well known creek in a barbed wire canoe without a paddle.
Abbott, however, has really blotted his copy book by inviting William, Kate and baby George to visit us, at enormous expense to the Australian taxpayers, while cutting back on assistance to needy Australians.
Be that as it may, Flint must never under any circumstances resign from ACM.
While he remains where he is, he is the best thing going for Republicans and the creation of a Republic of Australia.
Thank you David from all Australians.
The originals of John Graham's art, as featured in this piece and elsewhere on IA, are available at very reasonable prices by contacting the editor at editor@independentaustralia.net.
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Australia License
Support independent journalism Subscribe to IA.
