A FEW WEEKS ago, Sunday newspapers in the Fairfax stable, published the results of an opinion poll which claimed the push for an Australian republic is dead.
Needless to say this prediction caused a frenzy of Monarchist salivating and our old friend Professor Flint was almost beside himself. He was almost incoherent such was his excitement, trotting out his dire warnings of what he quaintly calls a “politicians republic”.
There’s no point in regurgitating his boring predictions of doom and gloom which will envelop us in the event of the demise of the ethnic German House of Windsor. But he did trot out a never before used description of the English royal house.
“Dare I say”, he hissed,” it’s an elegant family”.
For God’s sake – to call that collection of misfits "elegant” is really going too far, even for Flint.
Let’s take look at the next King of Australia – Prince Charles - that’s if his dear old Mum doesn’t die before him.
Surely the most ardent monarchist – with the exception Flint – would be hard put to call Charles’ stated ambition “elegant”.
Readers will recall the leaked telephone conversation he had with his then mistress – his now wife and the next Queen of Australia.
“All I want darling”, he told Camilla”, is to be a tampon inside you!”
The next King of Australia’s ambition.
Not really professor.
Our next monarch is on a par with the West Australian parliamentarian, Troy Buswell, whose only claim to fame was being caught sniffing the seats his female staff had been using.
At least Buswell stood aside when his “addiction” became public. For all we know Charles might still have that burning ambition!
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