Reviews have been mixed about Prime Minister Scott Morrison’s cameo as a water boy in a rugby league international in Fiji on the weekend.
A barefooted Morrison was seen running bottles of water out to hydrate players in the second half, which the Australian Kangaroos official Twitter account described as “prestigious”.
The Australian Footwear Manufacturers Guild, however, put the boot in, describing Morrison’s bare feet as a “clear example of his total lack of support”.
Morrison was also seen hydrating himself in the stands, downing a number of tinnies, watched on by a seemingly bemused Fijian PM Frank Bainimarama.
Scott Morrison had a beer, with his legs widespread, not even engaging with or sitting next to Prime Minister Frank Bainimarama at an official overseas engagement. I’m with Frank not Matt. pic.twitter.com/2ChjkQF62M— Kaz 🌏 (@kaz_neena) October 13, 2019
Also causing widespread remark was a damp patch in the crotch of Morrison’s moleskins, widely advertised via a vast manspread.
The Australian Brewers League, on the one hand, applauded Morrison’s extremely open support for the beer industry.
“There’s nothing we like better than seeing a gutsy Australian prime minister pissing it up,” said an ABL spokesperson.
However, representatives from communities in the lower Murray were less pleased with Morrison’s antics.
“It’s very disappointing,” remarked one farmer. “Yet again, we see it’s cotton that gets irrigated first.”
Scott Morrison himself hosed down his critics, saying his performance merely “demonstrated his strong commitment to drought relief”.
Trickle down theory. pic.twitter.com/nW29Hmfj5V— Dave Donovan (@davrosz) October 12, 2019
Opposition Leader Anthony Albanese said Scott Morrison’s leadership must be called into question after this display.
“I’d say he [Morrison] is in a wee bit of trouble,” said Mr Albanese. “That’s a Libspill there if ever I’ve seen one.”
The PM, however, doused down any leadership speculation.
“What a drip!” responded Mr Morrison. “Sure, it’s not easy being Prime Minister of this vast incontinent, but there’s no way I’m letting it go down the drain.”
“Why can’t people just relax and focus on a great game of footy? I mean, how good is soccer?!”
You can follow managing editor Dave Donovan on Twitter @davrosz.
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